Gender-based violence is accepted as“normal”
“I always think that persons with disabilities suffer from gender-based violence because they have disabilities. Moreover, this is a private family matter, so if other people know about it, they will laugh at it, and the women might even be beaten more by their husbands for being big mouths”. This is what V.T.T.T., Duy Thu Commune’s OPD, Duy Xuyen District, Quang Nam Province, said.
Many other persons with disabilities have the same thoughts with T. regarding gender-based violence. They did not dare to speak up and seek help for fear of embarrassment and objections, for fear that problems will become more serious instead of being solved. Many persons with disabilities are even unaware that they are victims of gender-based violence. Particularly, the community is also unaware of the seriousness of gender- based violence.
“She was abused by an acquaintance, which caused her disability. She told me not to tell anyone. She said it was over, as if her fate was like that and she must bear with it,” said X., whose daughter used to experience violence and become disabled.
K., a person with a disability in Dai Loc District, said that she suffered from sexual violence, which made her have an unwanted child, but she remained silent and did not dare to speak up because she thought no one would believe her. Moreover, her family believes that it is be a blessing in disguise because she can rely on her child in the future.
It is known that in Duy Xuyen District, there are many women with disabilities whose husbands have often gone out for alcohol, then got home swearing at them and beating them. These husbands assume that their wives have failed to fulfil their duties as wives due to their disabilities, which is a burden to them. At such times, the wives often ran to the house of T. to take shelter, then returned home and continued to suffer violence.
The fact is that many other women with disabilities have experienced gender-based violence in different forms and at different levels. Nevertheless, they have endured it in silence and waited until the injury has gone away without speaking up. They themselves have no knowledge of gender-based violence for prevention or where to go for help.
The journey to change the awareness
Since May 2019, ACDC’s “Raising Voices, Creating Opportunities” project supported by USAID, has conducted many communication and training activities to raise persons with disabilities’ awareness of prevention of and response to gender-based violence in Quang Nam Province. These activities have taken place in six districts, towns and cities for 230 persons with disabilities.
Having directly participated in the training course, T. and other women with disabilities in Duy Thu Commune, Duy Xuyen District, have understood that gender- based violence is a violation of the law and persons with disabilities’ rights. persons with disabilities themselves are not at fault. The perpetrators are at fault and must bear full responsibilities. They have also been provided with knowledge and skills to prevent and respond to gender-based violence, along with places that persons with disabilities can go to when experiencing gender- based violence.
After the training, a woman with disability shared: “It turns out that I used to suffer from gender-based violence, but I didn’t know. I thought they were just joking.”
In Nui Thanh District, the training course in preventing GBV against persons with disabilities also attracted many persons with disabilities for participation. Some of them had to row the boats and then walk nearly two kilometers to attend the course. They said that the knowledge they learned was very new and meaningful to them, and they would apply it for themselves and share with other women with disabilities who did not have the opportunity to participate in the training course.
“We will not keep silent!”
After participating in communication and training activities to raise awareness of gender-based violence, persons with disabilities have understood their rights while having more motivation and confidence to respond to gender-based violence.
T., Duy Thu Commune’s OPD, Duy Xuyen District, Quang Nam Province, said that she would actively discuss with Women’s Union, the local police, Provincial Organization of Persons with Disabilities, etc. for reporting when any members of Duy Thu Commune’s OPD experienced gender-based violence to seek help and protect their rights instead of remaining silent like before.
Recently, the project has received a call from a female member of OPD. She said: “Yesterday, a member with a disability was beaten by her husband and ran to my house to take shelter. I advised herself and her family to report to Women’s Union because this had happened a few times. Women’s Union and the local authorities visited her house to give advice and reconcile them. Her husband then pledged not to use violence against her. Although there are still such cases in my commune, other women with disabilities and I will no longer endure in silence. We will ask for neighbors’ intervention or call the authorities to come and resolve so that we will have a more equal life and will not suffer from such violence.”
Preventing gender-based violence against persons with disabilities, in general, and persons with disabilities in Quang Nam Province, in particular, is a long journey with many barriers. However, with the contributions of the project, the community’s joining hands and more importantly, the voice of women with disabilities, it is believed that in the future, gender-based violence against persons with disabilities, especially women and girls with disabilities, will gradually come to an end.
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